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|| SportsShooter.com: News Item: Posted 2002-10-24
Chimping: The new (and improved) instant replay.
Part Three of 'Runnin' With The Flash Cards' at the 2002 World Series in San Francisco. When will it stop?
By Grover Sanschagrin
Photo by Grover Sanschagrin
World Series (and World Class) Runner Greg Fortescue - RUNNING. As this picture was being shot, someone yelled at him "HEY! NO RUNNING!" Ironic, huh?
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Day Two of the World Series in San Francisco, now complete. And I've got some new observations to report. Shall we?
Who Needs Instant Replay?
As part of my runnerly duties, I must appear frequently in the photo work room to deliver my precious cargo. At one point I looked up at the television (which, by the way, is delayed about 5 seconds and it creates an odd sensation when watching it – you can hear (and feel) the crowd go nuts after a play, but see nothing on the television for 5 seconds. And you thought you were watching the game live! HA!)
Anyway – I looked up at the TV and there was a banner of text stripped across the bottom that read: "Should instant replay be implemented?"
Well, there's no need to ask this question. Based on my observations as a World Series Runner, I've got the answer.
Chimping.
That's right. The answer to this question is to ask the photogs. Not only are they the smartest folks in the stadium, they've now got instant-replay abilities thanks to those really fancy digital cameras they're shooting with.
I watched, several times, the ref made a call, and within seconds afterward, heard the photographers grumble that the ref made the wrong call... based on iron-clad evidence gathered through collective chimping.
(For those of you who don't know what 'chimping' is, conduct a search on this site using the word, and you'll learn all about it.)
So here's how I see it working: First step, get rid of the refs. Totally. Remove them from the field, wish them a nice day and put them on some kind of a work placement program. Second step: Rename the photographer shooting positions. Stop calling them "photo wells" and "shooting baskets", and instead call them 'the jury positions.' Third step, when there's a close call, all eyes on the 'jury positions.' The photographers employ their chimping skills to determine the answer. (Why not? They're doing it anyway!)
Thumbs up from the photographers inside the 'jury positions' means SAFE! Thumbs down, OUT!
See! It's simple.
* * * * * * *
Photographers Are Talking To Their Cameras!
It's the strangest damn thing I've ever seen. Photographers stop every once in a while to talk to their cameras. Odd.
Because of the sound of the crowd and the music they play in the stadium (Metallica!), and that they are talking so close to the camera that their voices are muffled, I can't really hear what they are actually telling their cameras, but I'm thinking it must be something to do with those new fancy DIGITAL cameras. Some new added feature that lets you talk to it – and the camera actually LISTENS!
Here's some example dialog of what could be going on here:
"Hi. It's me again. You've been doing pretty well so far. But hey, Bonds is coming up, and I've got a request. Three words, buddy... BALL ON BAT. That would be really... uh, hold on, gotta shoot, be right back..."
- Click, click. Click click click. –
Photo by Grover Sanschagrin
Just what exactly IS that liquid on the floor? Who cares... just don't step in it. I've got a damn deadline.
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"OK, I'm back. Damn foul tip. Anyway, as I was saying, it would be great if you can work out the ball on bat thing for me. Thanks. Oh, and hey, exposures are looking pretty sweet, but it would be great if you could play nice-nice with the remotes. Think you can do that for me, pal? Buddy? Great. Thanks."
The Hazzards Of Running
So, you're thinking it's pretty easy stuff, huh? This running business is a cake walk compared to the 'real job' of shooting. Ha. Well I am here to tell you otherwise. Stadiums have actual spaces carved out for photographers. There are no spaces carved out and set aside for us runners. No. None.
We need to make our own spaces and pathways. And in doing so, we come face-to-face with MANY hazardous potentially life-threatening situations. As a runner, you've got to be alert. You're crossing through territory at the speed of sound in a race to get your cargo to the editing room, and if you're not a defensive pedestrian, you could fall prey to some of these common hazards.
Spills. Who REALLY knows what kind of liquid that is on the floor. Could be sticky. Could be slippery. Could be hot or cold. Could be vomit. Hell, if could even be a mirage! But it isn't worth the risk of stepping on it. Let me tell you that one right now. Keep an eyes out for, and STAY AWAY from, the spills! Spills are NOT your friend. Trust me.
Cables. They come in all shapes and sizes, and nobody really knows what they're for anyway. It could be some wire that runs the entire scoreboard that gets tangled up in your feet. It could be the cable that powers the radar gun on the pitcher. It could be the one single wire that the entire Internet is feeding through. It could be a FAKE wire put there by the MORTAL ENEMY of the runner (JOHN Q. PUBLIC), as a giant conspiracy to MESS WITH US. You just never know. But there is one thing I do know... you don't want to be tripping on any of them. You could hurt yourself, and worst of all, screw up your delivery times. Cables: Avoid them.
Photo by Grover Sanschagrin
Cables. Cords. All just one big conspiracy if you ask me.
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* * * * * * *
And finally, I'd like to end this third installment of "Runnin' With The Flash Cards" with a tribute to fellow-runner and all around swell guy, Greg Fortescue. His performance during the past few days ranks right up there as a MasterCard 'Memorable World Series Runner Moment.'
His dedication to the photographers in which he serves is second to none, and downright impressive. With his pockets jammed full with supplies (spare envelopes, pens, tape, batteries) he is able to predict what will be needed before the need is actually there. And he is ready. The sweat pouring down his face is proof that he actually RUNS. No walking for this man.
So here's to Greg – "A runner's runner." May he read these words and somehow stop hating me for having it easy up there with Bert above third base.
(The forth and final - as in, the last - installment of this bizarre series comes to to SportsShooter.com tomorrow. Don't miss it.)
Related Links:
Link: Part One of this Series
Link: Part Two of this Series
Grover's SportsShooter.com Member Page
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