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|| News Item: Posted 2003-06-30

Photodude: What Does a Member Look Like?
By Photodude

Random thought from the 'Dude #1:

If someone is sponsoring a workshop featuring speakers like Peter Read Miller, V.J. Lovero, Andy Hayt, Robert Beck, Vince Laforet, Jack Gruber, Jose Luis Villegas, Deanne Fitzmaurice, Ben Van Hook, Trent Nelson and Robert Seale, and it cost LESS than a 512 megabyte compact flash card, and it conflicts with your schedule, should you:

A) Assume that the brains behind an organization named "Sport Shooter" might not be aware that they play college football games on Saturdays in November?

B) Assume that ALL the top sports photographers in the country who agreed to teach at said workshop FOR FREE are not aware that college football games are played on Saturdays in November?

C) Complain in a message board post to anyone who will listen that all the people involved in creating and teaching at the workshop FOR FREE are apparently unaware that college football games are played on Saturdays in November?

D) Complain in a personal email to the person who brought the whole group together and ask for a date change to accommodate your schedule because YOU are aware that college football games are played on Saturdays in November?

Hey, just wondering …


Okay, here's one from the mailbag …

Hey Photodude,

Okay, smart-guy, answer me this. How can I tell a member when I'm either at a game, or watching one on TV? I mean, what does the prototypical member look like?

A Big Fan.


Dear Fan,
It's easy. Look for overweight middle-aged white guys dressed badly in Dockers, with dated haircuts and mustard stains on their shirts...oh, wait, never mind ...that's baseball beat writers!

As for Sportsshooters, look for the following signs:

He (mostly male members...heh-heh, I said male "members") would carry a Canon 400/2.8, not a 600/f4, while wearing a Mountainsmith Tour Pack (except for Robert Beck, who has a Lowepro endorsement), sporting Oakley sunglasses, NOT wearing a vest (except for Mark J. Terrill, who apparently has an endorsement with either Domke or Banana Republic).

Oh, and he'd be eating Krispy Kremes (except for Ed Wolfstein, who likes Tim Hortons better, which is like saying you prefer Tully's coffee --- most people haven't heard of either one, no matter how good they are.) And from the looks of most shooters on the sidelines these days, he'd look like he'd had PLENTY of those glazed donuts in the past few years.

And he wouldn't use condoms, or admit to it (except for Aric Crabb, who apparently has an endorsement with Trojan).

Photo by John Leyba

Photo by John Leyba

Jack Gruber. The women love Gruber.
Oh, and if you see a guy in a Sport Shooter bucket hat, that's surrounding by fawning females shouting, "oh, there's that cute Jack!", well, that's Jack Gruber.


Random thought from the 'Dude #2:

Is Paul Cunningham the only dude at Major League Baseball doing any photo work? Rich Pilling has apparently only taught young Mr. Morse only one thing so far this summer-how to cruise the message boards...


Time for the Photodude's Monthly Top and Bottom Five Lists!

Top Five:
1 Having shot combat or war, and never having to tell people you did so...
2. members like Scott Eklund and Kurt Jones getting double-truck rides in national magazines.
3. Jed and Beck being willing to argue in front of everyone, and educating people in the process.
4. Matt Hevezi's message board thread on "PJ Heroes"
5. The work of Ami Vitale (even though she's not a member).

Bottom Five:
1. Arguing that because you've been to a war that you automatically know more than someone who hasn't.
2. Bob Deutsch having not updated for over 100 days.
3. Trying to pass off computer-altered photo illustrations as real photographs.
4. Otto Gruele not being a member.
5. Stealing message board topics from this column.


Finally, and in closing, random thought from the 'Dude #3:

Really now, does the fanny pack make the shooter? Or is it the monopod wrap?

DISCLAIMER --- The Photodude is NOT Bert, Grover, Brad or Jason, nor does he claim to represent their interests, ideas or opinions in any way, shape or form.

As always, send your rants or raves to the Photodude at:

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