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Bill Engvall's "Here's your sign"
Scott Gardner, Photographer
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Albany | OH | USA | Posted: 9:00 PM on 02.25.05 |
->> For anyone that is a Bill Engvall fan (one of the Blue Collar Comedy Tour guys).....
I'm an athletic trainer for the Ohio University baseball team and take photographs during some of the games. Today, I'm in the dugout shooting with my D2H with the 80-200 lens and the first base umpire yells out "TIME!!!" Yells at my direction , "Is that a camera?" I'm confused and just answered "Yes?!??!" Then he tells me I can't shoot from there.
So, I guess I should have said, "No, it's a new catcher's Mitt" or "No, it's a new radar gun design" but I didn't think quick enough.
BTW, the rule the umpire was thinking about was for video cameras in the dugouts. I will have to clear this up with tomorrow's umpire crew. Just thought I'd share this fun with everyone. |
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David Boily, Photographer
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Montreal | QC | Canada | Posted: 9:26 PM on 02.25.05 |
->> I got one for you. This summer while covering the Montreal Expos, I had to pass by some scalpers at the main doors. Now keep in mind I have a big white lens (camera mounted) on a monopod and a wait full of lenses and a press pass clearly dangling oround my neck. Well, 9 times out of ten they tried to sell me tickets. But that's not even the "Here's your sign" part.
One day the scalper sees me coming and asks me what RADIO station I shoot for! I was so dumbfounded, all I could say was that this CAMERA doesn't record sound. (actually it does but...)
Here's your sign... |
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Mark Smith, Photographer
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Elk City | OK | USA | Posted: 9:57 PM on 02.25.05 |
| ->> "No sir, it's a newfangled, hi-tech catcher's mask........here's yer sign". |
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Brad Wilder, Photographer, Student/Intern
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Lexington | Ky | USA | Posted: 1:12 AM on 02.26.05 |
| ->> Then there's always the classic. While carrying two bodies, a 300/2.8, press pass, laptop case, the works, someone always has to ask, "Hey, are you a photographer?" |
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Wesley R. Bush, Photographer
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Nashville | TN | U.S. | Posted: 1:25 AM on 02.26.05 |
| ->> And are we ever going to get past the point where people always ask the one-word question, "Digital?" |
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Scott Bort, Student/Intern, Photographer
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Champaign | Il | USA | Posted: 4:08 AM on 02.26.05 |
->> At a major sporting even............(theoretical)
"Is that digital?"
"Nope, just got a tv on my camera to watch the game."
here's your sign.... |
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Chuck Steenburgh, Photographer, Photo Editor
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Lexington | VA | USA | Posted: 8:51 AM on 02.26.05 |
| ->> "What TV station do you work for?" |
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David Higginbotham, Photographer
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Decatur | AL | USA | Posted: 10:07 AM on 02.26.05 |
->> That is the one that used to bother me the most Chuck! "What channel am I going to be on tonight?" The Moron Channel that's what! Geez.
Once I was shooting a feature story on a teenager who was going through some aspect of Space Camp and he looked at me as serious as he could be and said, "Being a photographer doesn't take a lot of head work does it?"
"Just slightly more than it takes to be a teenager" I muttered to myself. |
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Micah Miller, Photographer, Photo Editor
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Murfreesboro | TN | USA | Posted: 12:57 PM on 02.26.05 |
->> My all-time favorite...
At HS basketball games parents come up to me "Can you help me, my pictures always come out blurry and dark?" I look at their brand new digital rebel or d70 and who would have guessed..P mode 1/60 F5.6 iso 200...Git R Dun |
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Val Horvath, Photographer
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Clute | TX | USA | Posted: 2:29 PM on 02.26.05 |
| ->> People ALWAYS come up to me and ask me if my camera is a video camera and when they're gonna be on the news. It's their favorite question, and it kills me. A D2H with an 80-200, much less a 17-35, on it doesn't resemble any video camera I've ever seen. Does anybody have any take on why soooooooo many people can't recognize a still camera when they see one? |
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Larry Vaughn, Photographer
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Gainesville | FL | usa | Posted: 2:32 PM on 02.26.05 |
->> Strange. I went to bike week last year and several guys come up to me and wanted to know how much my white lens cost. No other questions.
Several others merely lifted up their girlfriends shirt when the saw me and my big lens. |
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Mark Smith, Photographer
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Elk City | OK | USA | Posted: 2:59 PM on 02.26.05 |
| ->> I know what you mean, Larry, that shirt thing always happens to me also, sometimes even when I have my camera. |
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Michael Granse, Photographer
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Urbana | IL | USA | Posted: 3:44 PM on 02.26.05 |
->> Chuck beat me to it, but pretty much the same story.
When carrying my 300mm f2.8 at small town high school football games I have often had the question "which TV station will this be on?"
In one instance, I answered "I shoot stills" and their reply was "oh . . . is that on cable?" |
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Glenn Russell, Photographer
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Jericho | VT | USA | Posted: 6:13 PM on 02.26.05 |
| ->> My favorite retort to the "What TV station do you work for?" is "I'm shooting for radio today" (It's not my line). It does seem to momentarily stun and confuse which allows me to escape. |
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Larry Vaughn, Photographer
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Gainesville | FL | usa | Posted: 6:18 PM on 02.26.05 |
| ->> Another question I used to hear is "Where does the picture come out"? |
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David Harden, Student/Intern, Photographer
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Tucson | AZ | USA | Posted: 7:56 PM on 02.26.05 |
->> The one I always get is like Scott and Brad's from above, but a little different.
It never fails that I will be walking around with a camera around my neck, camera bag over my shoulder, and press pass dangling, and someone always asks...."Taking pictures?"
"Nope, I'm going for the best costume award they are giving away before this press conference...Here's your sign." |
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Tony Sirgedas, Photographer
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Eatonville | WA | USA | Posted: 8:02 PM on 02.26.05 |
| ->> I had one the other day, not related to my camera though...... was shooting something for the local zoo when a kid comes to me and asks if I had seen a group of kids go by???? We were standing in a group of about 200 kids at the time watching the keepers....... er's yer sign. |
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Michael Myers, Photographer
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Miami Beach | FL | USA | Posted: 8:08 PM on 02.26.05 |
->> Many of the above responses assume that the person saying these silly things knows enough to ask a sensible question. I don't think that's the case at all. To someone who doesn't know diddly about cameras, a D2h with 80-200 probably looks the same as a television camera. The parents asking for advice probably wouldn't have the foggiest idea what "P" mode is or means. And the people asking "are you a photographer" are probably just trying to start a conversation.
To anyone who really knows about this stuff, these questions sound pretty silly, but I doubt if that's the intent of the people asking them.
---------------------------------------------------------
Two years ago, I was on stevesdigicams.com asking why image size was being displayed in "pixels" (whatever they were) instead of something sensible like inches. :-) |
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Byron Hetzler, Photographer
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Granby | CO | USA | Posted: 8:22 PM on 02.26.05 |
| ->> I have had my share of "here's your sign" experiences--many similar to those already mentioned. But a few years ago I have to admit I pulled one of my own. Early one morning at a golf tournment, I was walking from the club house to where the wire service I was shooting for had the darkroom (remember those?) set up. On the way I was face to face with Greg Norman and I came up with a brilliant "going to play some golf today?" |
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Eileen Blass, Photographer
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Kennett Square | PA | USA | Posted: 8:40 PM on 02.26.05 |
->> Without fail, on my way into an event schlepping several cameras, a backpack and a 400 2.8 over my shoulder.....someone will say to me "wow, isn't that stuff heavy?"
My response always is "Yup, I used to be a lot taller." |
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Jan Langsner, Photographer
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Lloydminster | AB | Canada | Posted: 8:58 PM on 02.26.05 |
->> I'll also admit to my own moment.
I was waiting for a high school football game to start, one of the home team coaches walks up to me looking at my 400 2.8 lens and said "now that's a cannon". My response was no it's a Nikon. Right after that came out of my mouth, I realized he was referring to the size of the lens, not the brand... May I have a sign please. |
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Chris Hires, Student/Intern, Photographer
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Bay City | MI | USA | Posted: 10:20 PM on 02.26.05 |
| ->> Today shooting volleyball I was setting up a set of lights and lugging around my D1H and with a 300 and a woman asked me "do you shoot for the newspaper or somethin'?" I wanted to say "Nope, high school year book. Our budget is awesome. Here's your sign." |
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Steven Georges, Photographer
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Garden Grove | CA | USA | Posted: 10:48 PM on 02.26.05 |
->> The cool thing about most people being clueless about what we do for a living is it makes it easer for us to do our job. It always amazes me how quickly people go from being aware that a camera is pointed at them to totally forgetting I'm alive. It's what I call the butterfly effect.
"Oh look, a camera! What station is he from? Is he taking a a snapshot of me? If I smile at him he'll keep shooting me. What is he. . . oh look, a butterfly!"
BTW - The "P" on the camera stands for "Panic!" |
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Scott Kroll, Photographer, Photo Editor
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Fairfield | CT | USA | Posted: 10:55 PM on 02.26.05 |
->> This kinda goes along with this post.
On that yearbook idea...
I was shooting a HS basketball game the other night for a yearbook company and actually had my 300 2.8 with me. Another photographer who was shooting for a small local walks by, sees my lens and says, "Looks like the big boys are here tonight, are you shooting for the AP or a wire service."
I say, "Nope, yearbook company."
Needless to say the look on her face was priceless. |
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Nic Hume, Photographer, Student/Intern
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Victoria | BC | Canada | Posted: 12:23 AM on 02.27.05 |
->> I'd like to just echo Michael Myers comments above... Just because we, as photographers, have a unique and specialized knowledge of the gear we work doesn't mean that other folks will, or even SHOULD, have a clue...
I shoot for a university newspaper. I get gazillions of assignments to do environmental portraits of professors, grad students, and a myriad of other folk who are all ASTOUNDINGLY brilliant, and far smarter than I can ever hope to be... A few of them know a bit about photography... it's a great way to relax people and chat them up while you're working... Others, MANY others in fact, couldn't tell a camera from a toilet plunger ... One guy I shot, who happened to have a Masters degree in math, a B.Sc. in Biology, and was nearly done his M.Sc. in Bio AS WELL asked me the "is that digital?" question...
Does anyone here REALLY think I'd have been in-line if I'd replied with some smart-ass comment about it being a video camera? Or that I was taking pictures for a radio station?
Somehow I doubt it.
Next time one of you goes to shoot a nobel-winning physicist, think about exactly HOW stupid *YOU* must sound to HIM when you ask what that nifty-looking gadget in the corner does...
I'm not saying that there aren't dumb people out there... Just commenting that maybe, just maybe, not EVERYONE in the world has the same specialized knowledge that many of US do...
--Nic |
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Wesley R. Bush, Photographer
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Nashville | TN | U.S. | Posted: 12:56 AM on 02.27.05 |
->> Nic: We all know, man. We're just joking.
(And don't think for a second that a physicist isn't going to run back and tell his friends about the photographer who didn't know the difference between "Schroedinger's cat" and Cat Stevens. ;) |
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Dan Neri, Photographer
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Franklin Square | NY | USA | Posted: 10:13 PM on 02.27.05 |
->> When shooting at a soccer tournament with 4 other photographers a man walks up to the table with 4 1D's, 3 400mm lenses and 1 300mm lens and says to me, "WOW can you see the moon with that??"
I point up to the moon visible in the afternoon sky and say, "You can see it without this".
I picked up my gear and walked away while the guy was still scratching his head. |
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Jack Kurtz, Photographer
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Phoenix | AZ | United States | Posted: 11:08 PM on 02.27.05 |
->> I was photographing a bug researcher who was developing antivenins for various tarantulas and spiders. Things were going pretty well until I thought I would make idol chit chat asked him if he had seen "Arachnophobia." He looked at me like I was from Mars and told me that it was fiction.
I am not sure who should have gotten the sign, but certainly one of us, probably both of us, should of walked out of there with one.
Jack |
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Chris Peterson, Photographer
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Columbia Falls | MT | USA | Posted: 11:47 PM on 02.27.05 |
| ->> I used to shoot for a small daily outside Buffalo and readers would say they saw me at Bills games. Didn't ya hear us yelling at you? They'd ask. Oh sure, your voices are distinct from the 80,000 other people... |
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Sam Santilli, Photographer
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Philippi | WV | USA | Posted: 11:59 PM on 02.27.05 |
->> My new favorites since we started selling onlie: "So when you put these online, how come I can not down load them?"
"Why do you charge shipping and handling?"
"Will the company name be on my pictures when I get them?"
"My daughter's hair is messy in that lay up shot, can you fix that?" |
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Les Hassell, Photographer, Photo Editor
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Longview | TX | United States | Posted: 2:01 AM on 02.28.05 |
->> Several years back I left the office to cover a campaign stop with, then Texas Gov., Ann Richards. I showed up at the hotel where the event was planned and went to the desk to find out where I needed to go.
"Yeah, I'm here to shoot the Governor."
That when over real well... I guess that was a few years before, "Heres you sign, " otherise, I'm sure I would've had one around my neck. |
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Robert E. Hudson Jr, Photographer, Assistant
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Pasadena | CA | USA | Posted: 2:20 PM on 02.28.05 |
| ->> I'm still perplexed by the question, asked of long lenses, "How far can you see with that?". I generally try to answer questions empathetically, but I just don't know how to answer that one. |
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Barbara Perenic, Photographer
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Miamisburg | OH | USA | Posted: 2:32 PM on 02.28.05 |
->> So I'm shooting Miami University basketball last weekend, the ESPN-covered bracket buster game against Wichita State. Trying to avoid the mob scene after the game ended, I ducked into press row to shoot the breeze with my writer. One of the ushers yelled after me "Ma'am, are you a member of the press?" Ok, wearing a backpack, 300mm plus camera over one shoulder, 70-200mm with camera around my neck, press pass around my neck, notebook in shirt pocket, hat on backwards, chewing on a pen... YOU THINK?
The really funny part of this story is that I was back at Millett hall twice this week and the same guy asked me the same question again, each time.
Tournament time is always a joy. I've been told to not use flash twice in eight days when I was shooting with a D1. The second instance I'm ashamed to say I got smart with the one of the judges at a gymnastics competition, who said it was disturbing the other judges. Silly me, I tried to bestow upon him a brief overview of my camera's anatomy, including showing him the 550EX that was still in my bag. He grumbles and says "we'll be keeping our eye on you."
Quakin' in my size 6 1/2 boots, sir.... |
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Eric Lian, Photographer
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Sebastopol | CA | USA | Posted: 2:52 PM on 02.28.05 |
->> I know you're all just funnin' around...
Carrying a large lens is like holding a puppy. It's an ice breaker - an opening people can take so they don't have to address you directly at first - a funny quirk in human nature. People don't always say the right thing, or ask the right questions but I always respond in a friendly manner or try to answer their questions the best I can. Who knows, they might be my next client.
To Robert H. re: "How far can you see with that?".
If I have my 400mm on the stick I just usually tell them "about six and a half miles." It doesn't really mean anything, but it sounds impressive and never fails to initiate the wide eyed nod of shock and approval ;)
-Eric
***** |
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Louis Lopez, Photographer
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Fontana | CA | USA | Posted: 2:57 PM on 02.28.05 |
| ->> I have been to a few schools where the yearbook department has better equipment than most large newspapers. all digital 2.8 long glass and computers that are all state of the art. So the yearbook comeback is very believeable nowadays. It's nothing like when we were in high school. |
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Steven Georges, Photographer
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Garden Grove | CA | USA | Posted: 3:08 PM on 02.28.05 |
->> I just came back from the Port of Long Beach where I was shooting donated stuff animals being shipped to tsunami victims. (yea I know, how cute) When I arrived at the location I went up to a dock worker who told me they were gathered at the bow of the ship. Momentarily forgetting my maritime terminology he saw the perplexed look on my face and said, "the pointy end of the ship!"
I'll take one of those signs please. |
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Chuck Steenburgh, Photographer, Photo Editor
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Lexington | VA | USA | Posted: 3:17 AM on 03.02.05 |
->> This doesn't have anything to do with photography, but...
My favorite "here's your sign" stories date from my years as a pizza delivery guy. Two stand out:
- We sold medium & large pies (12" & 14") and individual slices (of a 14" pie). This was a common exchange on the phone: "How much for a large?...$10...How many slices in that?...8...How much for a medium?...$8...How many slices in that one?...8, they're just smaller." As a math major in college, I finally did the pi*r-squared thing and figured out surface area and divided by 8. Of course, your average caller had no idea how 14 square inches of pizza compared to 19 square inches, but it sure shut them up quickly.
- 3 people would order a pizza and ask that we cut it into 9 slices...they must have figured I was a math major from the "how many slices" response...but, having no protractor in our kitchen, we usually just sliced it into 8 as usual then cut one of those slices in half. |
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Sue Jarrett, Photographer
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Beaufort | SC | USA | Posted: 9:07 PM on 03.02.05 |
->> Many moons ago I was shooting our hometown HS kids participating in the Drake Relays. In the stadium press box were soft drinks and cookies. My HS teacher husband had accompanied me to the meet and had on the paper's unused reporter's pass and I had the photo pass on. He was sitting in the bleachers in front of the press box.
I went in and came out with two soft drinks and a couple of cookies. The guard wouldn't allow me to come out to the bleachers with the drinks or give one to my husband. Here's your sign... |
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Zac Pagett, Student/Intern, Photographer
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Bowling Green | KY | USA | Posted: 2:40 PM on 03.03.05 |
->> My favorite from a friend of mine at a golf tournament...
400 w/ body and monopod on one shoulder
300 w/ body and monopod on the other
70-200 hanging off the shoulder
50 hanging off the neck
Hey.. are you a photographer?
nope.. I'm the photographers caddy... |
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Larry Vaughn, Photographer
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Gainesville | FL | usa | Posted: 3:28 PM on 03.03.05 |
->> I remember the cute Italian girl in college that started talking to me about how a fellow photographer's 400mm lens was "a phallic symbol".
I never took the hint, but then, I didn't have a 400mm lens either. |
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Nancy Crase, Photographer
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Phoenix | AZ | USA | Posted: 10:36 PM on 03.03.05 |
| ->> Then there are the parents at a prep game who see my 300 on the 1D-MII, a 70-200 on a 1D, and assorted pocketwizards, clamps, strobes, etc and remark that this is getting to be quite a hobby I've got. Agghhhh! |
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R. Grabowski, Photographer, Photo Editor
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Roselle | IL | USA | Posted: 11:04 PM on 03.03.05 |
->> Hey Larry,
I used to shoot hockey and when a woman would come down to the glass and say "WOW, that's some big lens you have!" My response would always be "Genetics"! Next line was "How You Doin???" |
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John Tucker, Photographer
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Cordova | TN | USA | Posted: 11:29 PM on 03.03.05 |
| ->> Now the athletic trainers are shooting during the games? I thought the parents were the competition!!! |
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Randy Fellers, Photographer
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Batesburg-Leesville | SC | USA | Posted: 7:12 AM on 03.04.05 |
->> Last night at HS track & field.
20D w/70-200 in my hand, 1V w/wide zoom hanging on shoulder, oddly shaped black bags and packs with various lenses, flash and other photo stuff hanging out circling my waist, light meter around my neck, Sport Shooter hat on head, taking photo of long jump landing.
"Are you the guy that takes pictures?"
Help me.
The sign, please. |
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Jeff Blake, Photographer
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Athens | GA | USA | Posted: 9:49 AM on 03.04.05 |
| ->> My favorite is, so do you JUST take pictures, or do you write the story too? |
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Bob Ford, Photographer
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Lehighton | Pa | USA | Posted: 12:12 PM on 03.04.05 |
| ->> When they ask me if I just take pictures I usually respond, "No, the reporters just write". |
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Alan Stewart, Photographer, Photo Editor
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Corydon | IN | USA | Posted: 12:47 PM on 03.04.05 |
->> ->> My favorite is, so do you JUST take pictures, or do you write the story too?
That's really what I do (write AND photograph)...do I still get a sign? |
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Robert Caplin, Student/Intern, Photographer
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Athens | OH | USA | Posted: 12:52 PM on 03.04.05 |
->> John T-
Note that Scott is the Ohio University athletic photographer AND athletic trainer (not to mention he's pretty handy in the wood shop). So, I wouldn't consider him "competition" like the parents who give away their photos.
You can see lots of his work at: http://ohiobobcats.com/
Robert |
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John Tucker, Photographer
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Cordova | TN | USA | Posted: 3:51 PM on 03.04.05 |
->> Oh, I just read this part:
"I'm an athletic trainer for the Ohio University baseball team and take photographs during some of the games."
I read the "some of the games" as him doing what he wrote........but then again he's a photog, not a writer.............Next week it'll be the coaching staff snapping a few shots during the games. |
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Michael Myers, Photographer
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Miami Beach | FL | USA | Posted: 4:27 PM on 03.04.05 |
->> It might be better to answer some of these "stupid" questions with a real answer, so the person learns what is going on. ...or if the person is just trying to start up a conversation, either do so, or find a polite way to excuse yourself.
A better way to cure ignorance would be education. |
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